Happy Hallowhine


Halloween is a time when the scariest of monsters, the high-whining femshee, shows yet again that they will find any excuse to play the victim. They display a frightening level of idiocy, bemoaning the torture of an experience they don’t actually face as an example of their phantom concept, male privilege.

What terrifying threat do women face on Halloween? Vampire boyfriends? Murderous beasts on the night of the full moon? Ghoulish stalkers? Things that go bump (and grind) in the night?

Naw… it’s far more serious than that.

Faced with stores full of costumes and components for their own costume designs, freaked out femshees everywhere have discovered that among offerings for female shoppers are a wide variety of costumes designed to show as much skin as humanly possible while still adhering (sometimes rather loosely) to the costume’s underlying theme, a display that gets noticed by… gasp… MEN!


She’s a lumberjack
and she’s okay

Every year, hordes of shrieking femshees descend upon the Halloween scene intent on sucking all of the fun from the holiday. They wail over the sale of seductive costumes, lamenting that these are the only costumes available for women, and howling that men must ignore these market-imposed uniforms of servitude because women just don’t have any other choice. They accuse the mad capitalists of the costume manufacturing industry of trapping women in the dungeon of their own provocative nature, any sexiness achieved by wearing said costumes being strictly outside the woman’s control. They roar about objectification of women by men’s haunting stares.


Even more beastly: It’s a bald-faced lie.

There’s no evil conspiracy to commit misogyny in women’s Halloween closet! Fear not, inhabitants of the night, for you have the power to eclipse your nether regions in folds of polyester, lace, velour and even odder materials. I, Eagleyra, have braved the terrifying maze of holiday planning and found epic potential. Are women’s costumes the only ones that “objectify?”

Not really.


No true Scotsman
would lose
a sexy costume contest
to a girl


Reality: everyone has the option to self-“objectify.” Everyone also has the option not to.  Your costume choices are far from limited.

All you have to do is use your brains, and anything else you happen to have on hand.

You can even bring your kids.


He’s been so good.
He listened to his deadtime story and ate all of his vegetarians,
so I let him come with me.


You see, femshees aren’t trapped alone against a wall of sexualization by a dearth of unseductive costumes. Their hunt is for the unattainable treat: A sexy looking costume which will help a wench hawk her wares without appearing to do so, giving her the power to attract without appearing to seek attention. The real issue beneath the femshee lament is that they lack the funds, the finesse, the physique, or possibly all three. Their Halloween costume complaint is not evidence of male privilege or predation, but merely another example of one of feminism’s most oft used mental tricks: Ignore part of the information to focus on that which when viewed alone can be dressed up to suit their needs. Women are not oppressed by either their choice of costume, or by being stared at because of what they’ve put on display. Noticing which choice a woman makes does not make a man some kind of a monster, even if he’s not the man she was trying to impress.

So this year I place upon all of you the curse of the independently happy woman, who need not stuff herself into a box of ill-fitting standards and desires under the guise of celebrating a holiday:

A rational thought. Own it if you’re gonna show it off, knowing that if you’re objectified, you’re doing it to yourself by your own choice. If you’re not adult enough to to accept that, you are not adult enough to wear that costume in the first place.

And you don’t have to. You could just embrace the creepy side of Halloween.


I do.


C’mon over here and give creepy a hug!


One more thing: Don’t take yourself too seriously. It takes all of the fun out of the holiday.


I don’t know, Bob. I’ve only had this TV for seven days.


Happy haunting!


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Hannah Wallen
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About the author

Hannah Wallen

Hannah has witnessed women's use of criminal and family courts to abuse men in five different counties, and began writing after she saw one man's ordeal drag on for seven years, continuing even when authorities had substantial evidence that the accuser was gaming the system. She is the author of Breaking the Glasses, written from an anti-feminist perspective, with a focus on men's rights and sometimes social issues. Breaking the Glasses refers to breaking down the "ism" filters through which people view the world, replacing thought in terms of political rhetoric with an exploration of the human condition and human interactions without regard to dogmatic belief systems. She has a youtube channel (also called Breaking the Glasses), and has also written for A Voice For Men and Genderratic. Hannah's work can be supported at https://www.minds.com/Oneiorosgrip

<span class="dsq-postid" data-dsqidentifier="2121 https://www.honeybadgerbrigade.com/?p=2121">13 comments</span>

    • Damn you to hell, I wanted to go to bed over an hour ago…
      You are not the wind beneath my wings, you are the bags beneath my eyes…

      Cool comics.

    • Yep, that is me… shot one year (can’t remember which) when I was ready to head out to the annual Yellow Springs, Ohio zombie walk. Scared the crap outta the other undead, too. XD

  • I think I’ve a quick explanation, that even Feminists might understand, as to why these sexy costumes are sold, and sell: “Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.” – Oscar Wilde

    I think women like these because dressing in those allows a person to become.. moreso – more confident, more aggressive, more relaxed, more personable doesn’t even pertain solely to “sexy” Halloween costumes. Look at the way wenches get at RenFest once they’re in skirts down to their ankle and necklines damned near the navel. (Okay, maybe it’s the corsetry *and* the fact that we’ve been drinking meade since 11am). Look at Cosplay, where people compete to get the meticulous details of a character’s outfit that was drawn specifically to defy the standards imposed by the laws of physics.

    Costumes leave people confident enough to come out of their shell, to go for attention that they might not reach for regularly, especially in a way they often wouldn’t think to do so normally.

    But then, this is 4am, and I write a porny webcomic, so what do I know about the real world?

    • That’s a really good explanation. It’s something I’ve also noticed about being in costume. I’m able to be more outgoing in costume, I don’t mind as much that I’m awkward about it.

  • So it’s not the Patriachy saying to women “YOU WILL BUY AND WEAR THESE SLUTTY COSTUMES YOU SHAMEFUL SLUTS!”??

  • But I have to take it seriously. I work tonight, at an amusement park, and I’m a Haunter/Monster. I get paid to scare people. It’s hard work, but I love it.

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